Coming Clean
by Serenanna
Summary: Some things cannot remain a secret forever, neither affairs nor the scars of the past. Sometimes coming clean means more than just taking a shower. KakaSaku, Oneshot, Lemon.


Coming Clean

A Naruto fanfiction, By Serenanna

Warnings and Disclaimers: I don't own Naruto or any of the characters. I'm just borrowing them to play with. I'll return them later, promise. There is adult language and content as well as sexual situations in this story. So, if you're under 18, leave now before your virgin eyes are scarred forever, if you're over 18, enjoy!

Story Notes: This is a Kakashi/Sakura fic and yes, it will be all lemon, but there will be some plot set up first and last, and drama bordering on angst (maybe?). Relative ages are 36 for Kakashi, and 22 for Sakura. Being this is fanfiction, liberties were taken with the actions of the characters and timelines. Certain parts of the fic are not canonal and some are, I just don't know which ones. Some of this fic will also spoil you for recent manga chapters if you're just watching the anime. Also, I would like to thank J-Pop Princess for her help in pre-reading and encouragement, especially when it came to the lemon. I guess I haven't lost my lemony touch after all. This story is the by-product of an idle mind with idle fingers. This is your fair warning to back out now before it's too late.

* * *

Kakashi jumped up through the open window and stopped, frozen at the sight on the bed, his bed, before relaxing somewhat. He should have expected that she would be there, fanned out on the twisted, unkempt sheets like she belonged there. And usually she did belong there, naked and not dressed in her red and black uniform, the figure-hugging one inspired by her mentor's style that reminded him too much of their Hokage and her wrath if she ever found out what he'd done with her protégé. 

He couldn't help but keep staring as she seemed to be dozing on the shuriken-print covers, her bound breasts rising and falling with each even breath of air. The short sleeveless red yukata she wore was bound by a black obi and red cord clasped by a white circle brooch. Those tight black pants of hers never changed, but the crimson split skirt over top was a better addition to his eyes than the tan one. The tall black sandals she wore since sixteen hadn't changed either. Maybe if he was lucky she'd stay like that, and he could quickly leave before having to face her with or without another argument. Yet, as one jade eye of hers slowly peeked open when he turned away, the ninja knew he'd never be that lucky.

She smiled up at him and he groaned, rubbing his one visible eye. He knew there was a reason that he wanted to close the window that morning, and it was to keep her out, "Sakura . . ."

"You said to come over, didn't you?" she asked, moving to lay on her side, posed gracefully with one leg bent over the other. The ninja stepped down from the ledge and quickly closed the window and the curtains, plunging the room in darkness. "I meant tonight," he growled, increasingly agitated while moving around her, "When no one else could see you come in."

Sakura pouted, flipping a length of long pink hair off from her shoulders, "So much for pleasantly surprising you . . ."

"This isn't one of my games, oh favorite student of mine. There are consequences to this. You agreed to keep up appearances."

"Since when have you ever cared about appearances?" she shot back, sitting up to face him, "You're the one that came onto the training field first all those months ago and watched me move through the katas. You're the one that kept coming back each morning to watch me. And when you finally revealed yourself, you're the one that looked at me like a starving man begging for one scrap of affection. You're the one that couldn't believe I'd grown up into a woman you could learn to love. If you didn't want me then you shouldn't have kissed me first. You certainly shouldn't keep inviting me over to spend the nights in your bed either. If you don't want me now then I'll just leave."

The kunoichi crawled off the bed, sauntering past Kakashi and towards the door when his hand shot out to grab her wrist. He pulled her around till her back hit the wall, looming over her petite stature. She didn't cry out or even act surprised, staring back up at him, as if she was daring him to make a move. Under the stare of those jade eyes, his anger withered while his covered forehead pressed against the wall. He never should have started this, never should have even touched her in the first place. But, with one look from her eyes his world turned upside down and over again. As much as he acted like he didn't care what anyone thought about him, he did care, a lot. Having the whole village know that he was lovers with his ex-student would shatter every essence of cool eccentricity he had left. Actually, that was the least of his worries. There were other things that knowledge that public could shatter too.

Sakura didn't seem to understand that, no matter how many times they argued over the matter. He didn't understand why she kept coming back to him either. Every single time he attempted to push her away, she simply rolled back his way like a lost ball looking for the deepest divot to rest in. Maybe it was just part of her nature, to follow the object of her affection like one of his obedient dogs. Maybe she just liked how far she could push him, which was far. Her hands reached up to pull down the sweat-soaked mask, peeling it from his skin. Kakashi exhaled slowly as her lips touched his cheek, ignoring the kiss until she giggled, "You stink."

That was a lie, which Sakura silently scolded herself on. Even if he did stink of sweat and dirt, the scent of air and ozone after a storm stuck to him permanently, tingling her senses. Kakashi's nose scrunched up in distaste at the comment anyway. With a grunt, he pushed away from the wall and her, "How observant of you. Of course I stink. I've been training all afternoon, and my clothes are sticking to me."

She watched with a slow-growing grin as he turned away, stripping away his forehead protector, his thigh holster, his pouches, his vest, his mask, and his shirt as if she was never there. There were reasons she said yes to a man that could infuriate her as easily as he fascinated her, and one of them was everything she discovered about him when he got naked. Watching the Copy nin take off his clothes was the closest she'd ever get to watch his armor being stripped from him, and he only ever did it in front of her or alone. Once it was off, he seemed to become someone else, someone less like the hero of Konoha, a weapon designed to accurately kill, and more like a human being. Just like that, Kakashi was no longer the sensei she grew up with, nor the powerful ninja everyone else respected, and not even the team leader that had pulled her along through the most painful and dangerous times in her time. He became himself, she supposed, scars and all.

Sakura hugged herself and watched as he sat down on the toilet and unwrapped the bandages from his feet, pants and underwear following them to the floor. He must have already known she was staring as he didn't look at her in asking her a simple question, "Are you staying or going?"

Her foot stomped on the floor. Damnit. He got naked so she wouldn't have a choice but to stay, as irresistible as he was. When she didn't answer, his head peeked around the doorway. His lips quirked into a smirk, and her insides dissolved into butterflies with a mumble, "Staying . . ."

"What was that? I couldn't hear you."

"I'm staying," she said more clearly, barely managing to keep her eyebrow from twitching in annoyance.

"Still didn't hear anything,"

"I said I'm staying! You can't be that deaf, no matter how many concussions and perforated eardrums you've had!" Sakura yelled at him, the shout ignored as he put his back to her in standing up and kicked the door closed.

Moments later, the water from the shower started with a heated hiss, and she was thoroughly ignored. The kunoichi groaned with a roll of her eyes and pushed off the wall to fall back down face first in the bed. Her nose stayed buried in the sheet if only because they smelled like him, calming her frustration. She had to be as much of a sucker to stay in this relationship as he was. Being with Kakashi broke all her definitions of what a relationship should be, and all her ideals. Sometimes it seemed as if he purposefully tried to push her away, and other times, as if he wanted no one else but her. Above all, he wouldn't let anyone know how he felt about her, and thus, the secrecy. Sometimes she wondered if she really did mean everything to him or if she meant nothing at all. She couldn't even recall if he ever said he loved her or not after that one morning, just the he kept choosing her to sleep in his bed.

Sakura's fist pounded the mattress, putting a new dent in it.

And she just had to say yes to him. The naked thing helped, but that wasn't all of her reasons why. Kakashi seemed . . . so sincere that morning on the field after she hadn't seen him in how many years. She had changed so much over that time, grew up, yet he didn't seem to change at all with the same casual slouch and ageless droopy stare. He let her pull the mask away and then kissed her right there, surrounded by nothing but trees and grass. Her stomach warmed at the memory that seemed so perfect for a beginning. But, as she turned over with a sigh, she should have known that nothing would ever be perfect for either of them anymore.

The sound of the shower continued. On the bright side, it has been a month since the last time he tried to push her away, as if he had finally settled to the idea that neither of them were going to go any direction but forward. And on another bright side, he didn't tell her to leave after breaking his rule or when she said she'd stay. And . . . he was teasing her again. Kakashi choosing to amuse himself with her temper was always a good sign that her company had been accepted. Never did he show any other emotion towards her in the general public except friendship and the teasing. Perhaps there was a masochistic side to her personality after all since she not only always came back to him for the past few months, but she took his teasing as well when anyone else would be punched through five walls at least. She must have been insane to rationalize that every time he did tease her in public that his way of showing affection to her.

Her foot kicked at the floor while waiting. He was taking a very long shower, and a hot one from the steam curling up the top of the bathroom door. A delicate pink eyebrow arched when she saw that the door had somehow opened a crack. Sakura rolled off the bed and to her feet. Treading carefully, she snuck up to the slight glint of light through the opening, watching.

He had apparently forgotten to pull the shower curtain closed or left it open on purpose.

Kakashi stood under the spray, hands pressed against the pale green tiles while leaning forward against the sheer surface. His head hung down, letting the water and silver hair run down his face. A knot of tension wrapped itself around Sakura's stomach then tightened, the warmth she felt earlier beginning to seep into the rest of her skin. This was another reason she was glad she said yes when he asked for a kiss. What red-blooded woman would have said no to him at such a sight? His face was neither of the two extremes she expected. No fish lips or buckteeth, yet not stunningly gorgeous either, neither baby-faced nor ruggedly sculpted. He was just handsome and very much masculine . . . until he smiled. One flash of dimples and her heart would pound. He didn't look a day past thirty, and he looked even younger with a rare smile. Unfortunately, he often never smiled at all and certainly wasn't smiling now.

Her green eyes drifted downwards, ignoring the increasing tension crawling through her skin. The rest of him was a sight to behold as well. Most ninja men went in one of three directions when it came to the physical appearance of the body, bulky and manly, or lean and made for speed. The Copy nin took the third route of a compact medium between the two, tall, broad shouldered, with a wiry set of muscles that sprung into new definition with each subtle movement he made. As much as she almost feel the memorized map of corded flesh under her fingers, touching him each time seemed to bring something new she hadn't seen before. Watching Kakashi stand there, wet and oblivious to the world and to her, made the kunoichi want to touch him more than ever.

He sighed, pushing the hair from his eyes, "The view is better from the inside."

Sakura squeaked, caught as the blush across her cheeks matched the red of her yukata. Her heart thumped even as she tried to suppress it. He wasn't going to get the better of her this time, damnit. She was twenty-two after all, and not a stammering genin anymore when it came to men. Her inner self cheered her on, instructing her on how to march in there like she intended in the first place since sneaking into his apartment, and speak her mind like the mature woman she was. She could do this. She could tell him what she wanted, without crumbling to a puddle at his feet. And yet, the pink-haired woman's hand shook as she reaching out to push the door the rest of the way open. Sakura stopped just inched from the wooden frame, fisting her hand to steady it as well as her nerves. She could do this, right? She could get him to finally come clean about their relationship, right?

Her eyes darted up to see him looking at her with one dark eye, the scared one closed, "Come in, Sakura."

Her resolve hardened. She would do this for the both of them. With a gentle push, she slipped through the opening and slowly slid the door closed again, leaving it open a crack. Kakashi didn't seem to notice, scrubbing his hair away from his face, "To what do I owe the honor of your presence, anyway?"

"Why do you ask that?"

"You don't sneak into my apartment unless you either want me, which can't be since you would be naked already, or you want to talk . . ." he trailed off, not needing to say more. Sakura moved along the wall of the small bathroom, taking in the surroundings as she couldn't look at him. The room was small, like much of the rest of his apartment, but oddly comforting for its claustrophobic feel. Maybe it was the old incandescent lights he used that kept the room awash in yellow light rather than harsh white florescence. Maybe it was the things he seemed to collect over the years jammed in the oddest places, even in a bathroom. And strangely enough, she didn't mind the peculiar-ness since it made the little apartment feel more like home than her own bed. Her feet shuffled on the floor in nervousness, looking for words. "I . . . I just came to ask you something," she said finally before trailing off, "But . . ."

Kakashi snorted a chuckle, smirking as he stood up again to reach for the soap, "But you're thinking right now that the question can wait."

He looked over at her, his eye starting as her feet and moving upwards. The hairs on the back of her neck tingled, knowing that the dark orb was undressing her in his head. Sakura's chin rose proudly, stretching languidly under his scrutiny, "And you're thinking of how much you would like me to strip and join you."

His eye widened, frozen as if considering that very thought. Half a second later, he purposefully looked away, lathering the soap vigorously between his hands, "I've already seen the show. No need to see it again."

Sakura's eyebrow twitched while her inner self shook her fist at him. Kakashi was lying his ass off, and both of them knew it. She frowned as he smirked, still pointedly ignoring her. He was playing with her, baiting her to do something. The trap he laid was too naked to be less obvious and too tempting to be resisted. With a bite of her lower lip, she bent over to open the snaps of her black sandals.

The sound of each closure being opened rose over the noise of falling water, ringing in Kakashi's ears as he practically twitched. So, she would be joining him after all. He scrubbed his chest harder, ignoring the clunk of the shoe as it was dropped on the off-white tile floor of his bathroom. Really, he didn't need to watch her get naked even if his eyes fought his better judgment to peek sideways at the kunoichi. He really should just ignore her. Maybe she would get frustrated and leave until the night, giving him enough time to put his mind back in order. And yet, when the sound of the other shoe dropping resounded in the small bathroom, not looking was no longer an option. The Copy nin's hands slowly down, watching her bare pale feet with pink-polished toenails pad across his floor to the sink, "You may have seen it already, but you denials wouldn't stop you from watching one more time."

Turned away from him, he couldn't see her hand undo the clasp of her obi, but he heard it pop open and saw the red cord loosen.

The soap in Kakashi's hand dropped from his grip, falling right on his big toe. He cursed, wincing at the pain before bending over to pick it up and wincing even more. Sakura's eyebrow rose curiously as she noticed how long it took him to get back up, and how stiffly he moved as well. "Are you ok?" she asked, genuine concern in her voice.

"No . . ." Kakashi scowled at her, starting to scrub himself again, "I must be getting too old for this if I can't survive one training session without feeling like I pulled something."

"That's because you probably did pull something. You're not old, just reckless like some other shinobi I know," Sakura said with a sigh, dropping the seductress act as she started pulling at her clothes faster now that there was a wounded shinobi needing her attention, "Give me a minute to get out of this thing."

His eye stuck to her hands as she unwound the black obi, quickly letting it fall to her feet. The red skirt was unbuckled next and thrown aside along with various pouches and holsters. Her short yukata billowed open at the movement then dropped off her shoulders with a shrug till she stood there in just white breast bindings and ridiculously tight black shorts. Kakashi's jaw clenched to keep from salivating, fiddling with the soap in his hands in distraction. He was supposed to be showering, not watching her strip. He had seen it all before anyway so there was no need to be foolish over the sudden shedding of her garments. And yet, he couldn't keep from staring as she pulled the ends of the bindings loose, or from commenting when she tugged on the strips, "You don't have to hurry on my account."

She smirked, stopping to hook her thumbs into the waistband of her shorts instead, "Well, if you insist . . ."

Mentally, the Copy nin insisted very much, just short of nodding his head in agreement. His eye widened as the dark material was slowly inched down the curve of her rear and hips as she watched him in the mirror. He didn't know how long it took her to get them on each day, but taking off those shorts was a painstakingly slow task for as quick as she went, revealing bits of pale flesh one inch at a time. The garment dropped to the floor when it passed her knees, kicked out of the way with a fling from the end of her pink-painted toes. His eyes stuck to those toes then followed up the line of her shapely legs before coming to a skidding halt.

Kakashi's breath caught on the line of black underwear, lace to be exact and threaded with small, thin lines of blood red running through the delicate material. He looked so closely that he could almost see a pattern in the material, red chrysanthemums clustered near the edges as they cut high over her ass. No woman in their right mind would wear panties like that unless they planned to take them off. And she wore them just for his pleasure. The very thought lanced down his spine and into his crotch. He saw her smile wickedly in the mirror, her eyes looking down at his physical reaction. "So, you do like them . . ." Sakura purred, very pleased with herself.

His balls tightened. He really did like her choice in lingerie, very much bordering on too much that bordered on asking her not to take them off; but he wasn't about to admit any of that to her. "They'll look just as good on the floor as on you," he smirked, cutting her victorious grin in half.

The seductive act was dropped once more with a frown. Her eyes rolled upward as she tugged on the bindings again, unraveling them methodically, "Say what you will, but you're still staring Kakashi. Why don't you just admit that you like looking at me? It's not like it'll kill you."

"But you just might kill me if I do. It's in your nature to get angry at the drop of a pin."

"I wouldn't kill you over a compliment."

"But you would kill me if I said that any woman getting naked in my bathroom just might get the same reaction."

Sakura's green eyes narrowed, boring into him through the mirror. Kakashi was right. If he did keep this up she just might kill him. The last wrapping of the white linen strips fell away with a tug, and she tossed the whole handful over the sink before leaning over it.

In spite of what he said, the kunoichi was correct even if he bent her words in the other direction. No other woman, clothed or naked, could make him stop cold in his tracks like he was right then and there, looking at her through the mirror as she examined her own appearance. She still fussed over her hairline, finding new ways to disguise her supposed wide brow. If her brow was too wide to be normal, Kakashi didn't notice. And when she complained about being short still at five foot four inches, he found it to be the perfect height for her since he could rest his chin right on the top of her head. But the absolute worst was when she complained about the rest of the way she looked. How she could think of herself as anything but beautiful was beyond him.

The years had finally matured her in spirit and body, neither as full-figured as her mentor or her friends nor as willowy and lithe either, but just enough of both qualities to be noticeable, very noticeable. Her beauty and grace was part of what drew him in after all, morning after morning as she went through the taijutsu movements alone in the predawn hours. It was part of what kept him coming back. Watching Sakura practice in solitude became part of his habit after paying his respects to the memorial for quite a while. And when it became too much to bear watching her all alone anymore . . .

Kakashi looked away, trying not to reflect on the past. What's done was done anyway, and there was no going back. With little ceremony, Sakura slid a hand down her stomach and into the panties to lazily push them down one hip then off the other, "I know you're lying to me. I've never seen you stare at another woman the way you stare at me. So, I suppose you can keep your denials, though. They seem to get you by just fine, sensei."

She smiled as the underwear fell to the floor as he scowled at her, "I though I told you not to call me that any longer?"

"Yes, four years ago. But, it still gets under your skin, doesn't it?" Sakura grinned, running a hand through her pink hair, re-grown down to the small of her back. He started to scrub with the soap again, trying to put her words out of his mind. Now who was the one teasing whom? Kakashi was just about finished rinsing when she stepped into the shower behind him, drawing the curtain closed. Her hand touched his shoulder, and any will he had left to fight her presence turned tail and ran. He dropped the soap back into the holder on the wall as her fingers rubbed the back of his neck. Slowly, Sakura pressed herself against him to hug him and he exhaled slowly in return, accepting the comfort. "I missed you too," he mumbled under his breath, patting the arms that clung to his neck from behind.

"I haven't gone anywhere, Kakashi. You know that."

"I know . . ." he trailed off, trying to come up with an excuse, "I hate hospitals, you know that. And it's never like we're alone in public anyway. Someone's always watching."

"You still don't miss my morning practices."

The Copy nin winced, caught red-handed, "I know . . . but, you know how I am."

"Yes, I do. All we have is the training field and this little apartment, huh?" Sakura asked, but not really expecting an answer. Some yearning in her voice tugged at the tight grip seizing his heart. She wanted more, that was obvious enough. Yet, whatever the kunoichi meant, she let it go just as she let him go, arms falling to the wayside. She reached for the soap, lathering up her hands, "Bend over again. Let me see what you did to your back this time."

Kakashi complied, braced against the tiles with his forearms, "I think it's my shoulders, pushed my limit on pull-ups again."

"Why doesn't that surprise me?" Sakura muttered under her breath before putting her hands on his back again. After a quick scrub to remove the lingering sweat and dirt sticking to his skin, her fingers dug into flesh, feeling the muscles underneath become rigid as she started to knead them. He had done something alright as both of his shoulders felt as hard as rocks. The heel of the medic nin's palm twisted into him, looking for the knot of muscles giving him trouble. The water falling down on them didn't help as her hand nearly slipped. Her tongue stuck out the side of her mouth as she concentrated, "This is going to hurt a moment."

"When does it not?"

"When you're not being a macho idiot pushing yourself too much."

"This is what I do, Sakura. What you do as well and-! Ow!" Kakashi yelped in pain at the sharp stab in his shoulder, as if something popped then fell apart. Her palm dug in, strongly rubbing the area as the muscles loosened. Slowly, he relaxed under her fingers, leaning more heavily on the tiles. He groaned as the pain slowly ebbed away followed by relief, "You could have warned me before you did that?"

"And let you braced against the pain? Not a chance," she said before moving her hands over to his other shoulder, "This is what I do as well, remember."

"How can I forget?"

Sakura giggled, kneading the second set of muscles under her shoulder, "Nothing ever escapes you, does it?"

Kakashi found himself grinning. Apparently all had been forgiven for whatever transgressions had passed earlier since she was joking with him again. It was her way of getting back at him, and her way of showing affection in and out of public, he reasoned. He would tease her to make her angry, and she would make fun of him and his ways. And, like the sucker he was, the Copy nin accepted it in stride where as anyone else would have gotten a kunai up the ass. Sakura's concern was evident in the way her fingers massaged the second shoulder more gently, looking for the spot that made his muscles bunch up painfully. He really did have to get her to stop worrying over him. It wasn't healthy for her, especially since he never worried for himself. If he did stop for a moment in a life and death mission to be so selfish to brew over worries, then he would have been dead a long time ago.

Her fingers found the knot and pressed into it, unkinking with soft pop. The way Kakashi reacted would not have made one think that particular pop was in any way soft. He twitched as if jolted by own of his own Raikiri's, cursing under his breath until ending with an, ". . . Ow."

"That sounded like an understatement," Sakura smirked, continuing the massage as he sagged against the wall again. The pain went away quicker along with the rest of the tension in his body the more she rubbed. When she could tell that Kakashi was relaxed, she stopped to lean over his back, whispering in his ear, "How does it feel now?"

"Better . . . Thank you," the Copy nin muttered, trying not to sound too grateful, "Who said you could stop?"

She giggled at him, rubbing his loosened shoulders again, "Any more stiff joints to work out?"

Kakashi smirked at the innuendo, resisting the sudden urge to shift on his feet. Well, he could think of one thing now that he knew she wasn't going anywhere. Sakura must have picked up on his thoughts as her hands slowed down, moving lower on his back. Could she possibly be thinking what he was thinking? Her fingers stopped massaging altogether as a knot of tension tightened in his stomach. Oh how he hoped she was, the anticipation of pleasure already turning him on.

And yet, her hands didn't move from where they rested on his skin, "Kakashi . . . we need to talk."

The silver-haired jonin bit the inside of his mouth to keep from groaning in frustration. How easily those four words could kill his ardor was thoroughly depressing. In truth, he wished she hadn't said anything at all. "Is this what you wanted to talk to me about earlier? Why you showed up in my apartment early in the first place?" he asked, barely holding back the aggravation in his voice.

"Yes . . ."

The way Sakura trailed off gave him all the information he needed to know since she only sounded like that whenever a certain topic in particular came up between them. And this topic always seemed to end up in another argument. Kakashi shivered under the spray of water even if it was still hot, "Not now."

"Then when? Why can't you understand how I feel?" she said, her fingers shaking as they move up to his neck, pulling wet silvery hair aside. His body reacted whether he wanted the touch or not, shuddering as she reached higher to his scalp, mussing the grey strands. The problem was that he did know how she felt, what she wanted from him. And he wanted nothing more than to give that to her . . .

But some temptations were worth resisting. Still leaning against the wall, Kakashi hung his head, her fingers removed, "I . . . How long will we keep going round like this then? How do you feel? Because I'm not too sure what to feel anymore myself."

Sakura wetted her lips even with the water pouring down her face. She bent over his back, pressing her face into his skin while she whispered, "Let me show you then, maybe you'll understand."

The Copy nin's hand tightening into a fist, relieving some of the tension building in him at just her words. He didn't dare move, not even as she nuzzled the back of his neck. Her mouth felt like fire on the juncture of his back and neck, pressing open kisses into flesh much too old and scarred for such delicate things. Sakura's hands traced down the outline of his spine and ribs and he couldn't stand being unmoved even if he fought to remain standing as still as a rock. He should have thrown her off and thrown her out rather than let her manipulate him into what she wanted, but he couldn't, not when he wanted the same thing she did for once. Her fingers brush down the curve of his bottom and Kakashi stiffened even as the hand when lower down the back of his thigh.

His breath hitched up, regretting ever teaching her how to touch him as she traced a lazy path on the outside of his leg and up to his hips. Embracing Kakashi from behind, the kunoichi's hands stopped being so gentle to grope along his chest instead, roughly feeling him up. She moaned, writhing against him, and the sound passed through him with a jolt. He could feel all of her body up against him, every inch of her petite frame and shapely figure rubbing over his back. She felt warmer than the water rushing down upon them but not as unbearably hot as the friction between them. Of course she knew what she did to him; his cherry blossom wasn't that naive any more. She wanted him to lose himself in that heat, and part of him was more than willing to give her what she desired. He would have given her anything, but did she know that? Her teeth nibbled on his skin, biting lightly as he groaned her name, "Sakura . . ."

A hand dropped to his waist, feeling the fluttering of his abdominals with each labored breath. "Why do you do this to me? Why do you keep me on the edge of suspense?" she asked rhetorically, her voice small and pained even as her hands moved lower still, shaking slightly as she inched closer to touching him, "Why can't you say you love me when we both know you do?"

"Shut up," Kakashi growled, trying to put her words out of his head. Hearing his hypocrisies in his head was one thing, but hearing them from the kunoichi's voice during sex was another. If she thought he didn't know her feelings then she was wrong. He knew all too well why he did what he did to her. The Copy nin reached to grab her hand from where it rested near his loins, but stopped short. He watched instead as her fingers curl over him, and the anger he felt towards her was gone along with his breath. Resisting her never worked anyway. Her hand began to stroke him slowly and he cursed ever teaching her what he liked. Kakashi groaned yet tried to stifle the sound, mismatched eyes watching her hand's movement over him as if mesmerized by the sight. His stomach roiled in knots, tightly coiled like a spring slowly being turned till it either burst or broke. He shuddered as her fingers constricted over his shaft, throbbing in need in her palm. She must have known the power she held over him.

Sakura's kisses turned into sucking on his back and shoulder, encouraged by the noises he fought to keep to himself. As much as he reasoned with himself that accepting the pleasure that made his heart pound was not giving in to her, it still felt like he was giving in to something greater than himself, perhaps not Sakura, but the idea of her. But if he wasn't in love with her, then why did he let her torment him? The nails of her other hand dug into the silver-haired man's chest, and he hissed in both pain and desire. He should have spun on her earlier and taken her before letting her drive him his far. She was his to have after all and no one else's, or, was it the other way around?

The cherry blossom's hand didn't let up, bringing him the pressure in his loins closer and closer to release with each pass. And yet, he still tried to rebel against what his body craved, prolonging his own torment as he shuddered terribly. No, he wouldn't give in to her, not another time, not until she-. Sakura's voice moaned in his burning ears, "Stop fighting me, Kakashi . . . sensei."

The jounin's resolve snapped at the added suffix and crumbled like dust along with a dizzying rush to the head. His balls tighten along with the coil of pressure in the pit of his stomach. There would be no turning back now, leaving him with nothing but giving in. His hand clamped over hers on his member, fingers intertwined. "I'm not fighting. I'm helping," Kakashi breathed, barely able to keep his voice from shaking, "Don't stop."

She pressed herself against his back and he couldn't take remaining unmoved anymore, his hips and body flexing back into hers. Ok, so, perhaps there were benefits to giving in to the pink-haired temptress, or so he reasoned. Their hands moved together and quicker, helped by the hot water still falling down around them. Kakashi nearly groaned, fist clenched and unclenching while leaning against the wall. He was so close and so sensitive that he could feel the ridges of her fingerprints in her touch, the scent of her own arousal, the feel of her breast pushed against his skin. As her hand on his chest fell away, he could just imagine where it went, wishing that was his hand touching her instead. His hips moved with abandon, ramming forward into their joined grip. He could feel the fire in his veins growing closer to boiling over with each choked breath, a release building under her touch.

Sakura bit his neck, and the last of his will to remain silent shattered along with his control. His climax hit with a shout that he couldn't hold back, reverberating from the top of his head down to his toes. Seed sprayed across the tiles in front of them. The release of pressure and pleasure flowed over Kakashi's mind and body, his eyes shut and face scrunched together while riding out the climax. Slowly, the world stopped spinning in his head and his eyes opened again to find himself still standing by some miracle. He felt more conscious to every sensation in that moment, from the almost scalding heat of the shower water, even if it was really only lukewarm, to the way Sakura's gentle kisses on his ear felt. The Copy nin also became acutely aware that her hand hadn't stopped even if she stroked him more gently, keeping him aroused.

Kakashi stopped the movement by grabbing her wrist then slowly raised her hand to his lips. She gave a surprised start at the feeling of her fingers on his mouth, and the slow kissing they received. That start turned into a gasp as he took her forefinger into his mouth, sucking on it. Sakura shifted on her feet, willing her knees not to give out. Yet, when the man stopped to turn around on her, she distinctly felt a weakening of her limbs and other bodily parts under his stare. Her hand quickly moved from where she had been touching herself, but not quickly enough to escape notice as he snagged her other wrist as well. He pushed her back against the wall just when she thought she would crumple to the floor. With the way the Copy nin towered imposingly over her, looking at her hungrily, she knew that she still might slide right down and fall on her ass. He pinned the arms he held to the tiles overhead, and leaned down to meet her face, foreheads touching, "Now, why do you do this to me?"

Her head turned, stubbornly refusing to meet his gaze, "What do you mean?"

He kissed the corner of her mouth and her cheek while moving back towards her ear, making her pale skin turn scarlet. Sakura squirmed until his knee planted itself between her legs, pinning the kunoichi in place. Kakashi's body ground into hers, hard and unyielding, and she reacted in kind, bending as a moan was ripped from her throat. He panted in her ear, "Why?"

"Why what?" she whispered, struggling in his hold. Trying to break the Copy nin's grip was useless, but she tried anyway, fighting both him and the growing itch between her legs to little success. She wanted to curse the shinobi as much as she wanted him inside of her, her fists clenching and unclenching. Damn him for figuring out how to turn her on without even needing to touch her. His hips pressed into hers and Sakura's back arched off the wall. The groan Kakashi gave as she pressed back against him made her shudder, "Why do you keep making me want you so badly?"

"Must be my wonderful personality," Sakura gave a slightly nervous giggle that was quickly swallowed by his lips. The hard kiss he gave her demanded much, forcing her mouth open and her head back. Kakashi pulled away roughly from the pink-haired woman's lips, grinning malevolently as his hands finally let go to drop to her hips, "I'd say it's more than that."

She snorted more laughter as his head dipped to nibble on her neck, "That I have the best legs in Konoha?"

"You wish," the Copy nin muttered, "But you do have a nice ass."

His point was well made by groping the firm posterior he referred to. Sakura jumped in his grasp, embracing his neck while her legs lifted to encircle his waist. Whether Kakashi was joking or not on her assets didn't matter at the moment to the pink-haired kunoichi. The only things that mattered were that he didn't drop her and that he didn't stop. Her fingers fisted handfuls of wet silvery-grey hair, clinging to him as his mouth latched onto a breast to lavish it with attention. She pulled away from the wall at the teasing only to be pushed back again, feeling him leaning heavily upon her, "Stay."

The hand on Sakura's shoulder that kept her stuck there didn't give her much room for argument. Even if the thought to argue did cross her mind, it was thrown out a moment later as his hand caressed the outside of her center. She shivered. The water felt colder with each splashing droplet on her burning skin, as if her flesh would burn off in the heat. Her green eyes closed, concentrating on the pleasure pulsing through her with each touch. She tried not to move like Kakashi said as his fingers parted her folds, but her hips jerked forward anyway when his thumb nudged her clit. Insidiously, his fingers repeated the move slowly, making her wish he hadn't pinned her so that she could crawl up the wall. Everywhere felt wet, inside and out, as if a torrent had ruptured inside of her. What was he trying to do to her? Yet, when his mismatched eyes glanced up her, lazy and droopy like normal but with a sparkle of mischief, she knew what was coming. Her face hardened, "I will not beg for you."

Kakashi smirked, fingers pushing inside of her folds as she gasped, "Is that so?"

"Y-yes," Sakura stammered, even if her inner self pointed out how she begged for it each and every time he chose to torment her, "This isn't fair after I-! Ahhh!"

A high-pitched cry cut off her words, reacting to the pull of his hand inside her. He kissed her, devouring the moans as they spilled from her mouth. She arched again at his manipulations, continuing to fight while stuck between the tiles and his body. The sound of her panting breath was louder than the roar of the shower water, but not as loud as the heartbeat in her ears. Maybe she should have begged him to finish her after all as his fingers moved in and out of her folds, his whole hand rubbing her. Her legs tightened over his hips, pushing back against the teasing for more, but the Copy nin didn't budge at all.

He couldn't help but grin as she twisted, wondering how much more self-congratulation he needed before his ego could stoke itself. Well, it wasn't as if he could help the fact that he was good with his hands. He also couldn't help the fact that she looked beautiful, even when she seemed half-mad with want. Correction, Sakura looked particularly beautiful in such a state, and especially when it was his doing. And yet, the torn look in her jade eyes struck him though along with a pang of jealousy. That look of longing in her eyes was just for him to see and no one else's. And so help him, he'd keep it that way. His fingers slowed to a torturously lazy pace, making her buck impatiently while words stuck in her throat, "Pleas-."

Kakashi grinned, pulling his hand away as she cut off her own words to whimper instead, "I'm not going to make you beg today, Sakura?"

Her body sagged momentarily, trying not to be disappointed at the lack of a climax, "Then what do you want from me?"

Before he could come up with a reply, she whispered, her eyes heavy in desire, "You already have everything I have to give, don't you?"

The silver-haired man couldn't help but kiss her, slowly sucking on her lips before stepping in closer. His body pressed into hers, pushing her back hard even as he lifted her hips more. The kiss stopped being so gentle with a tilt of her head, letting his tongue into her mouth. Sakura felt him against her center, hard and hot, and her stomach quivered in anticipation. She clung to Kakashi's neck and shoulders again, trying not to fret as he grunted and groaned between kisses and while moving her into a better position. Even if water rained down over them, she was sure that there were beads of sweat on his brow and under her fingers. Not to mention the shower floor was slick, "Shouldn't we be in a bed? You're going to pull something again-."

Coherent thought left her as he answered her concerns with one thrust. Her body clenched at the sudden intrusion, nails digging into his skin. She shook as the shinobi moved within her, slowly but powerfully with a roll of his hips. His arm planted itself on the wall, leaning heavily on it while pulling all but her shoulders away from the surface. Sakura's grip tightened, not about to ruin everything by falling. Yet, the effort was harder than she imagined. Each thrust made her feel weaker, the pleasure jolting her nerves and senses. Her nails racked his back, but Kakashi ignored the pain to concentrate on the quivering figure of the kunoichi tangled around him. No matter how many times they did this together, or fought, or were just simply in each other's presence, he couldn't get enough of her. He couldn't shut her out completely either. But then why did he keep feeling the need to try?

His lips glided over her neck, breathing in the scent of the wet, strawberry-pink hair clinging to her skin. Every part of Sakura smelled like her namesake except her hair. That part smelled cherry blossoms as well, but mixed with something green. It reminded him of the training fields during the summer, and that morning long ago. She moaned his name in rapture, and Kakashi pushed into her harder till the sound came out as a near scream. Sakura meant what she had said, every part of her was his for the taking, probably ever since their first kiss, and he knew it. But why did he still treat her like she wasn't important to him, when in reality-?

His thoughts stopped turning along with the grind of his hips before he pushed himself too far. Sakura kissed him, her tongue exploring his slack mouth. Who was he kidding? She was the only thing he had left in life except for his duty to Konoha, and that would never love him back.

Kakashi began to move again, watching each slow thrust pass across her jade eyes, "Say it, Sakura."

Her body shook in tremors each time he pulled out, her voice strained, "I love you."

His mouth came crashing down on hers, devouring the kunoichi as she struggled to keep up with him when he pushed into her faster. Her hips moved erratically despite the hand on her ass trying to control each countering thrust. She was close and he could see it in her eyes, silently begging him for an end. Another thrust and her eyes closed, squinted shut. This time, her voice was clear in his ear over the water and the thump of blood, "I love you."

He kissed her again, holding her tightly to his chest. The rush of emotion and desire went right to Kakashi's head, whispering when he pulled away, "You're mine."

Sakura screamed again but in affirmation and release. Her back arched terribly, pressed into him as her walls came crashing down like a vice. Kakashi shook as well, his body pushed to the edge as well by the feel of her shuddering around him. He moved within her still, unable to hold back any longer when he finally came. If she minded the bite on the neck he gave her to keep from shouting his release, she didn't say anything except to moan. The moment his seed spilled within her, all the strength in the jounin keeping them upright gave out as they crashed together against the tiles. Still joined intimately, they slid down the wall in a tangle of limbs and wet bodies.

For the moment, Kakashi didn't have the will to move from kneeling in the shower with Sakura still around him, not to turn off the water and definitely not to push her off of him. His head rested on her shoulder, not willing to move either, not even when her fingers threaded in his hair. She hummed in his ear, but he was too busy listening to the flutter of her heartbeat coming back down to normal to notice. Everything always seemed more vivid in the afterglow, especially with the kunoichi. He shivered, snuggling against her warmth. Everything was exactly as it should have been. Or at least it was for that moment until Sakura as the question he had been dreading, "Why can't you say it, Kakashi?"

"Sakura . . ."

"Three words, Kakashi, three words I say each and every time, but I've never heard you say them once. I . . . I just need to hear them, just once, even if you don't mean it. Why can't you just come clean?" she asked, the hurt clear in her voice.

His chest clenched painfully as his voice stuck in his throat, croaking out an answer, "Don't ask me to do that, Sakura. You don't know me well enough to know why."

"Then tell me why! We've been over this how many times now?!" she yelled at him, pushing the Copy nin's head from her shoulder, "Either you do love me and are too stubborn to admit it, or you don't, so which is it?!"

Kakashi glared at her, "If you don't know by now, after everything we've done together, then you'll never know."

Anger ignited in the kunoichi, pushing him away further, "If you do love me, then why won't you come clean about our relationship either?! Are you ashamed of me or am I just your little whore?!"

"That isn't what I meant!" Kakashi yelled as he tried to grab her wrists.

Sakura twisted away from the grip, blindly shoving him back, "Then tell me what you mean, you bastard! You never explain a damned thing to me, never pay me a compliment that isn't back-handed, and you sure as all hell keep sleeping with me regardless of what you do to me!"

He growled, throwing his arms around the thrashing young woman before she could take flight. If she wasn't so upset, she might have done some serious damage to him. As it was, he could feel the beginning of bruises on his torso where her petite fists had managed to hit. They struggled together on the wet floor till Kakashi managed to grapple her onto her back, using his weight to press down upon her. "Stop being so stubborn," he panted, scowling at her when she tried to buck him off between long pauses to catch her breath, "You're not getting up."

"You first, you old goat. I will throw you off eventually," she threatened, her glare boring into him. Growling, Kakashi pushed her down by the shoulders and reached up to turn the shower knob, stopping the flow of water. When he looked back down, he found Sakura glaring at the wall instead of at him, her lips turned downwards in a pout, "I don't understand you at all, Kakashi. I don't understand how that one morning I was sure you loved me, and now . . . I don't know anymore. All I know is how I feel, and . . . and I know I don't want to go back to being alone again."

Silently, the Copy nin agreed with her. Reaching out, he moved the strands of wet hair clinging to her cheek away before brushing his thumb over the soft skin. She looked up at him, the love she felt reflected in the light jade orbs, and Kakashi pulled away. He sat on the back of his legs, letting her scoot out from under him. After letting out a long-held breath, he looked up at her, "If I come clean, will you?"

The mysterious question made her blink. Her come clean? About what? She had nothing to hide from him that he didn't know already. Why would he ask her such again, unless-. Sakura froze, her blood suddenly chilled. Her eyes looked away from his mismatched pair, and she lied, "I don't know what you're talking about."

She looked at him briefly to see a grim frown set on his handsome face, "Yes, you do."

"Then you'll have to explain the question out loud," she shot back, knowing he wouldn't dare say what he wanted to her face. When Kakashi didn't say anything after a few moments, Sakura started to rise to her feet only to be pulled back down. She fell on her ass, wincing in pain when not glaring at him, "That hurt, you asshole!"

"You're going to tell me, Sakura, or else this is it. I won't let you back again if you leave now," he threatened, still gripping the wrist he had tugged on tightly. From the pain in his dark eye, she knew he meant it too. What choice did she have now? She swallowed the lump that had risen in her throat suddenly, and nodded, "Fine. Ask."

"At the funeral, you didn't cry for them, not once. Why?"

Sakura shivered, pulling her wrist from his hold as her blood turned to ice, "What does it matter? They've been dead for four years now anyway, so I fail to see the point."

"There is a point because you haven't shed a tear for them since then, or for me. I know I've hurt you before, intended or not, but you've never cried over it once. Why have you turned so cold to everything?"

Her glare was fiery enough no matter cold he insisted she was, "They're dead, Kakashi, and I've moved on. You've moved on. All of Konoha has moved on. All three of them, dead and gone from this world, and so what if I shed a tear for them or not? And so what if I don't cry over us? Maybe you're just not worth my tears."

The Copy nin didn't stop her this time as she got to her feet, angrily grabbing a white towel from the stack on top of an old, wooden laundry hamper. She quickly dried herself off, wrapping the scratchy terrycloth around her. Yet, as she tucked the end in over her breast, she suddenly stopped as he continued to speak, "They were our teammates, your friends. For so many years we fought together, trained together. I taught all of you, and them, and then they died by each other hands, killed by the very weapons given to them by me and their mentors, and you don't mourn them at all. Why, Sakura? Even your dear shishou shed tears over them. Why can't you?"

She spun on him, hands balled into fist till her knuckles turned bone-white, "Do you think I didn't love them too? Do you think I wouldn't give up everything, including my happiness with you, my very life just to see Naruto smiling at me with that stupid grin of his again, or to hear Sai insult me just once more? Even if Sasuke ignore me for the rest of my life, I'd still pay the price to see him again, and gladly! You have no idea of the depths my life plummeted to when they died, so don't you dare judge me on how I chose and chose not to mourn!"

Kakashi looked at her, the same droopy-eyed blank stare that was schooled on his face for so many years, and it infuriated her. He was as unmoved by her outburst as ever, and it made her gut twist in anguish. Sakura reached for her discarded kunai holster, about to draw a weapon to throw at him, when his hand stopped her. He always was too fast for her. She screamed in frustration, throwing his hand aside as she slid away towards the door, "Is that what you wanted to know or do I need to explain exactly how I've died a little inside too?!"

He didn't move to stop her, anger radiating off of her, "You don't cry either, you know, so don't you dare spout another one of your hypocrisies about it to me. You do love me but you won't say it even to my face. You want a relationship, but can't bring yourself to keep it anything but a secret. You want me in your life, but you keep trying to get rid of me. You supposedly care about your teammates, but always keep them at arms length. You never mean what you say or say what you mean. Do I need to keep going?"

He winced and reached for a towel as well, wrapping it over his waist, "You've said more than enough for the both of us . . ."

Sakura turned away, not bothering to scoop up her clothes as she moved towards the closed door. She opened it and stood in the doorway when Kakashi added on last comment, "But you still haven't said why."

The anger burning in her died, snuffed out at both ends. Suddenly, she didn't want to fight him any more anyway, a weariness settling over her. Where was the point anyway? Whether she told him or not wouldn't change the past.

Exhausted, Sakura exhaled slowly, her shoulders slumped, "I haven't cried over them because . . . it's weak. All I ever did as a genin until Tsunade-shishou's training was cry, successfully too. The only thing I had going was chakra control and some genjutsu as we both know, but I didn't have the inclination to do anything else. I was weak so I cried when things went wrong. Even when I thought I was stronger, when I thought I could keep up with them, I was still weak, and I still cried. When they died, together, I stopped crying because now I had become the strong one, even if it was only because they left me behind."

"You're not the only one they left behind."

"You don't have to remind me, but you've lost people before as well. You already know what it's like to lose everyone most important to you," Sakura said bluntly, not bothering to look at him to know she'd hit deeply. Even if her words had wounded him, Kakashi would brush it off like he did everything else including her.

"I've lost more people than I choose to count . . ." he trailed off, and for once she could hear some emotion in his voice, "It doesn't mean I've stop grieving over them . . . and it doesn't mean I won't stop trying to protect the one person I have left, even from themselves."

She froze again, a quiver passing through her. He was alluding to her, wasn't he? Sakura looked over her shoulder to see him glancing her while leaning against the sink counter, the Sharingan eye closed while the other orb of endless darkness drooped lower in sorrow.

"Even strong people need to cry once in a while, even to themselves. The Academy training is wrong. A shinobi who doesn't show emotion is not a shinobi but a monster. Only monsters can stare at death of friends and not feel anything in return. Neither of us are that far gone, but it doesn't mean some pieces aren't missing . . . When my best friend died, I cried too, once, then never again, not for my mentor, Rin, or anyone else. I've tried to be above everything, even sadness. But to be devoid of sorrow is to be hollow, a shell of a person. And then three kids passed my stupid test and became the hope I thought I lost. And then two of the three died, and started to feel hollow again, but . . . you remained . . ." Kakashi explained, avoiding her gaze, "I . . . I don't want you to turn as hollow as I was once . . . you're too important."

"Why . . . Why do you think that?" Sakura stammered, her voice choked in her throat.

"Why do you have to ask?"

"Because I want to play dumb for once; maybe you'll tell me something meaningful."

A ghost of a smile crossed Kakashi's lips as his eyes stayed glued to the floor. Her knees wobbled at the sight of barely-there dimples even if they were marred by the sadness in his voice, "You're everything I'm still alive for."

Sakura's knees shook as if they were about to give out before she forced them to lock. If he noticed, he didn't say anything about it expect to continue, "I am bone tired of seeing people die around me and for the longest time after those funerals I thought of nothing but doing my duty as I thought it was everything that I had left. I've failed to protect every single person important to me, once again. But then I saw you that morning while coming back from the memorial. You were training the taijutsu I showed you one time and I remembered that you were still there, my only hope. I know you know that I watched you each morning after that. I . . . I came out onto the field that morning because it was four years to the day that they died. I know you knew what day it was, and I couldn't stand to see you spend it alone anymore. I couldn't stand to see you spend any day alone anymore, because I realized that I . . ."

Kakashi gave an aggravated groan, burying his face in his hands, "How could you not know that you're all the hope I have left in this life? You are the most important person to me, the woman I . . ."

He trailed off, two words out of three left unsaid. But from the desperate look in his dark eye towards her, he had said enough. He loved her. Sakura delicately lifted her hand up to her cheek, pulling it away to look numbly at the moisture on the tips of her finger.

He loved her and she was crying, out of grief and love.

As the realization hit her, so did the force of her tears, rolling down her face in a torrent. Kakashi rushed forward, grabbing the kunoichi as she started to collapse. She fell on him and they both dropped to the floor, her towel coming loose from around her and falling away in disregard. Kakashi's arms held her as four years of withheld grief wracked the young woman's petite frame. It was the only thing he could do. Soothing her tears would have been useless. Comforting her when what she needed most was to let it out seemed wrong, and but holding her in her grief seemed even worse.

But still, the sensation of her tears raining down on his moist skin made the shinobi's grip on Sakura tighten, uneasy at the sound of her gasping breath and anguished cries. He buried his face in her wet hair, grimly determined not to let the misery shatter him as well. If only he had confronted her sooner; if only he wasn't a coward when it came to relationships; if only he wasn't afraid of love, perhaps he could have spared her some of the pain. "I should have told you . . ." he trailed off in a whisper, "I'm sorry . . . I never should have left you alone."

Sakura sniffled loudly and horribly, her puffy, tear-streaked face the opposite of all the beauty she was to him when she looked up. He didn't care what she looked like as his lips kissed her salt-stained cheeks, tasting the bitterness on her skin. Kakashi tried to wipe away rest before she collapsed against him once more; the sobs making her shudder under his hands. He sighed, resigning himself to the fact that if he was ever going to come clean with her, this was the time. Her breath came in near hiccups when the tears had run out. He didn't even know if she'd pay attention to his confession.

His hands rubbed her back in a soothing motion, speaking softly anyway whether she heard him or not, "I'm paranoid, about the little things, maybe a little superstitious. I don't think you ever knew that about me. I never told you, never even admitted it to myself before because . . . cause I was afraid that if I said it out loud, fate would find a way to kill you too. Crazy, I know, but anyone that utters those three little words seems to die. Asuma told Kurenai and then he got killed. Naruto told them to Hinata before we left then he and Sasuke killed each other. Sai said it to your friend Ino then died trying to break up their fight . . . I thought that if I could show you how much you meant to me, that it would be enough . . ."

The small punch he got in the shoulder told him otherwise, "Moron."

Kakashi smirked, brushing off the tap, "I'm a genius when it comes to ninjutsu, not women."

She punched his shoulder again, making him sway slightly, as she calmed down enough to not sound like she'd swallow a toad, "Then why don't you want anyone else to know about us?"

"Because it's tempting fate if the rest of the world knows how much you mean to me."

Her green eyes blinked at him, obviously needing further explanation. Kakashi sighed, leaning over her curled up form as she rested in his lap, "There's still people in this world that would take any opportunity to hurt me even if they couldn't kill me, including using you."

Sakura's temper flared briefly, "Now I can't take care of myself in your oh-so-professional opinion?"

He frowned, "I didn't mean that . . . just that there's always going to be a better ninja out there somewhere, and it reduces the odds of something happening if no one knows."

"Someone will find out eventually if the whole village doesn't suspect something already, Kakashi. Just denying there is something between us and trying to hide it is as much invitation as telling the whole world, and I . . ." she stopped to sit up right again, facing him, "I don't want to feel like a dirty secret anymore."

"You're not," he said firmly, nose scrunching up, "Even if you are thoroughly corrupt."

A smile twitched up the side of her face, "Just let me tell the people who matter, please? If we can come clean that way I'll feel much better."

"Sakura . . ."

"I'll even tell Tsunade-shishou myself then maybe she won't want to punch you from the Tower to the Gates and back."

Kakashi groaned, thumping his forehead on her shoulder as she giggled, "It won't be that bad."

Or so she said. Yet, was it really worth the effort anymore to keep up the charade? Maybe he was just being paranoid once more. Other shinobi had managed to make romantic relationships work, fleeting or not. Then again, paranoia had kept him alive this long, so maybe his instinct was correct. What if he was wrong and something did happen to her? Could he survive that tragedy too? But as he looked up to see Sakura's face smiling at him as she wiped away the tears, he felt something he hadn't felt in a long time, hope. Maybe fate would be on his side for once, if he had enough hope to believe in. Slowly, he nodded, "You win. I'll tell Genma, and Gai probably, tomorrow, and just for you. I suppose I, um, should talk to your father too . . ."

Sakura beamed at him before throwing her arms over his neck, nearly bowling him over in her exuberance. He could feel the radiant smile pressing into his chest, and in her giggles. A half-hearted smile crept upon his face then went away as quickly as it came. Somehow he knew he wouldn't be able to shed himself completely of his insecurities. Relationships, out of love or friendship, always seemed to elude him. He wasn't even sure if he could make her happy like she probably still dreamed of. Something would happen eventually, or so his gut feel kept telling him, and it would rip them in two or they would still be together if some miracle intervened. The only solace Kakashi had was in the thought that he wouldn't leave her alone again no matter what happened.

He smiled, looking down at the young woman, his cherry blossom, while she didn't notice at all. His hand brushed down her naked back then over her legs to curl under her knees. Holding her tightly, he got back up to his feet and carried her into the bedroom, flopping back down on the shuriken-print covers together. Sakura didn't seem to mind, snuggling contentedly in his arms and, and he was more than happy to let her stay there, naked and warm on top of him. Everything was as it should have been . . . except when she asked another question, "Does this mean you're still going to tease me?"

A broad grin spread across Kakashi's face, "You like it."

She blushed, caught, "I do, but it doesn't explain why you're so mean to me."

"Because you're adorable when you're pissed."

The kunoichi gawked at him, blinking rapidly before her confusion changed to anger, "I am not! Take that back!"

He chuckled, cutting off her huff by bending upwards slightly to kiss the end of her nose. Sakura blinked at him again then blushed, her anger stilled. He stretched under her and wiggled in the sheets, a contented grin on his face. Slowly, she relaxed as well, comforted by the sound of a steady heartbeat as her ear pressed onto his chest. She sighed and closed her eyes. Everything was as it should have been now, and she was glad of it. If she had lingering doubts, she didn't ask them. If she was afraid of their future together, she didn't say it out loud. Resting there on the bed in the warmth of his embrace made everything else suddenly not as important anymore. The past that had haunted her for so many years seemed as distant now as the tears she never shed till that day.

The only thing that mattered was that he had finally come clean and said that he loved her, almost. That, in and of itself, was enough.

* * *

The End 


End file.
